Right now, I’m supposed to be grading papers and writing letters of rec, but instead I’m blogging and listening to Pink on Alexa, which seems to be my vibe at the moment.
Sorry, guys…I will grade those papers and write those letters, I promise. But when goo is on your mind…it’s gotta come out to get to the good…as I’ve taught you.
Like the cool and refreshing breeze blowing through my open windows, on this last day of summer–before the seasons change…we can change, too.
Use that fresh air to freshen things up.
Inhale the cool. Exhale the heat. https://www.headspace.com/
So here’s my big heated exhale.
Insomnia is my frenemy, as you know. And last night, the words awoke me from any REM I’d hoped for, flowed through my soul, beat within my heart, pumped down my arm, and finally pushed out my right-hand through the Expo, and into the notebook I keep next to my embracing bed.
Writing for me is a lot like giving birth. But the Expo replaces the epidural. 😉
And there it was: Relation-SHIPS.
I’m no sailor. I don’t know the terminology. So I hit up https://asa.com/news/2012/11/27/sailing-terms-you-can-use/
But I already knew the feeling of going with the flow: allowing nature to take its course. To sail on calm waters or the choppiest of seas.
To tip. To tread. To use my own life-jacket or a life preserver somebody may throw my way. Ya gotta have those “somebody’s” in your life.
Some of whom you may have expected to throw you that life preserver may look away. Yet others you’d never would have thought may jump right in to help.
Life is funny that way. God puts the right people in our lives at the right time. It’s all part of the passage.
I know a lot of you are curious about this point in my voyage. Hence the non-blogging, non-social-media-ing, for quite some time.
Maybe you’ve been afraid to ask. Maybe you don’t know. Maybe you don’t care. Or maybe you were one of my “somebody’s” who threw out a life saver.
I’m okay. Yes, really.
I gave the ring back. I gave the dream back. I own up to 50% of the breakup, as in any Relation-SHIP: it takes two to “Aid to Navigation”. We just weren’t meeting each others’ needs.
But now I know better, so I do better. Was that Maya Angelou or Oprah–or both? I really need to start reading fiction again.
Drifting away, Meg. Anchor yourself, babe.
In this case, Gary Chapman and my cousin Lisa weren’t the only ones who were on to something. Winston Churchill was, too–and he was nautically inclined; afterall, he crossed the Atlantic three times aboard the Queen Mary during WWII.
So I took a really hard look at the results.
And I refunded the ring.
And in exchange, I got back my self. Bottomry? Was it hard? Of course. But a VIP showed me this:
Relation-SHIPS should feel good.
I will never settle for a crewmate nor a cabin, when the sailboat does not have a destination, but instead a vanishing angle. https://www.nauticed.org/sailingterms
Hey, if the shoe doesn’t fit. (Damn, I mixed metaphors…again.) And my Tory Burch’s don’t because my dog ate half of one. At least Frankie has good taste.
Anchor, Meg. Back on board.
Sure, I grieved. I had to. If you don’t, you won’t become resilient. You’ll never get over the hump. You’ll never be able to bounce back to life, to dating, to new possibilities. Become buoyant like Tigger.
Don’t know how? Still in a funk?
Read this book. My friends at Project Happiness sent it my way. It helped me so much that it inspired me to write a proposal to our district’s curriculum council to make “Project Happiness” a class of its own. If adults need it, our kids do, too.
I mean you can’t go wrong with Project Happiness. Or a forward by the Dalai Lama. Or Rumi. Who is quoted in the book on page 48:
You gotta go through the “Lee-side”, which happens, ironically, to be my deceased mother’s name. (When “heeling” over, “Lee-side” is always the lowest side. Nice one, mom. What doesn’t kill ya…lol.)
There I go again, drifting away.
Back to Lee: Mom loved Meryl Streep. Who doesn’t? Well, I think it was “Kramer vs. Kramer” when she says, “It’s time to dream a new dream.”
So I started dreaming new dreams. For my self. Clean-slate.
And now the waters are calm. The storm has subsided.
And I’m good. I’m no longer grieving, nor ambling. I have “keel”.
I’m Meg again. Phew. I really missed her! And apparently my friends did, too!
I’m at the “helm” and using the “point of sail” to direct my “heeling”.
I began dating again. Life’s too short.
And I’ve met someone. And he’s totally VIP, in every single way.
And I’m happy because so many slices of my “Life of Pie” had been missing. But I popped back up using my life jacket. You gotta get through that goo and do the hard work yourself. Swim and get back on board.
Are you in a funk? Then you’re either gluttonous with a slice or two of the pie and/or you’re anorexic in others.
I’m no fool. I live in the real world. As a single working mother I know that we can’t have all slices in a day. Or maybe even in a week. But going too long without all of those beautiful colors makes us gray. (Or should I say blue?)
So take a hard look at your pie. Is it the flavor you want: pumpkin, apple, cherry? Other? Bake your own then, and cut your own slices: big some days; smaller others. A la mode or not.
Just have a pie.
I had a hole.
(Not a pie-hole. Don’t go there. Get your minds outta the gutter, for Christ’s sake.)
So with my VIP, I’m just gonna “jibe” and just see where this “Relation-SHIP” sails. He’s a piece of my bigger pie. And I have my other pieces back, too. To be honest, I both want–and finally accept the fact–that I need a man in my life. More colors in my spinnaker.
So here I am: “Mid-Voyage Meg”.
My own sailboat, my own crew, my own pie, my own colors, my own plethora of books, my VIP man, my own shoe (sans Tory Burch) and all of my mixed metaphors. Here’s another one: my life ain’t no Cinderella story, folks.
And nobody really turns into her former self at midnight, anyway. Because the experiences up until 11:59pm have made us…wiser, braver, more optimistic, and more interesting.
So, if it’s Cinderella-time, let’s say it’s 12:01am…
What now? (I already have a pumpkin on my front porch.)
Okay, lemme try to wrap all my crap together.
Why not a sailor’s knot? Or any kind of knot. Or maybe we untie a knot. (Hell, I’ve done both and everything in between at this point.)
But right now it’s only 7:09pm on the last day of summer.
Seasons are changing, but it’s not yet midnight.
Being open to people who feel good and right together is merely expanding the pie. So accept them when they arrive. If they feel warm, like the last day of summer, inhale their crisp, refreshing air. It’s pretty cool.
So I’m going to enjoy the summer breeze before fall falls upon us, colorfully.
And if you’ve battened down the hatches and weathered out the storms to get where you are headed…then “Mainsail”.
All aboard, my friends. I’ll bring extra buoys and life jackets for you, should you need one. I’ll be your “somebody”.
Fun fact! I could not leave this out. Did you know that “Ahoy-Hoy” was Alexander Graham Bell’s preferred way to answer the phone?
It’s my new voicemail greeting. I’m not kidding.